Writer's Block - Free Write

*Warning: Contains a free write that is basically a stream of conscious jumble of verbal diarrhea. Yes. Writer's block. A freeze on words that are necessary for forming the next story in the Bookworm Stories series. I have my base. I already know the major event that is going to happen during the prom chapters. I've already referenced it. I'm working my way towards it. But what about what happens before this event? After? It's been 12 years since I went to my own prom. Even then I went stag because I was too shy to ask any off the guys - including the track team member I had a crush on, or the baseball player I had a crush on. That was an interesting semester... It's not like I was Miss Popularity. I was Miss Bookworm. Miss Awkward. Miss Socially Awkward. I'd rather be on the track running in circles and trying to improve my personal best times instead of dealing with the boys at my high school. (No offense, guys, if any of you are actually reading this.) No, I'd learned my lesson dealing with them before my Senior Year. Doesn't mean that I didn't enjoy high school. Doesn't mean that I'm anti-social - okay, maybe I kinda am, but that's more socially awkwardness combined with being an introvert, shy (there is a difference), and overthinking/doubting things. Like saying something to the person that caught my attention when I was in a relationship with somebody else. That relationship has ended. That other guy didn't catch my attention enough for me to end my perfectly good relationship. No, that relationship with J12 - I've dated a lot of guys with names that started with J - fizzled out on it's own with a nicely upsetting ending that had my lying about my relationship status for 3 months before I felt like even attempting to discuss it with anybody. 3 years wasted. Thank you J12. I'm still a little bitter about that. Especially when I still get e-mails from him every 3-6 months because he 'misses me'. Until I told him I was in a new relationship. That lasted 6 weeks. I've never been great with relationships. My own relationships. Oh, I can figure them out. I can dissect what went wrong. Thank you psychology minor and ability to analysis why people act the way that they act. But finding them? Keeping them. Not so much. There's still hope. Probably not with the current person I really wish I wasn't still crushing on. Annoying Yankee - his current moniker - J12 has one too - isn't interested in long-term relationships. Talk about a free write. This is probably more about this poor, romantically disappointed author than you wanted to know. Maybe I'll share some of my romantic misadventures later. (As to why I didn't get back with J12 - he just wanted friendship, not a relationship that was going somewhere. He wanted me, just not enough.) Now, to sit back and ponder if I'm actually going to publish this to the blog... Alicia